On this “World Autism Day”, I am sharing my first-hand enlightening experience of having trained an Autistic Adult (Childlike). This training session that spanned 2 hours, 5 days, per week for 5 months, was nothing less than a roller coaster ride of! the greatest order!
It was those warm and sunny days of November in 2014, when Bangalore weather does turn dry, nonetheless it was very pleasant.
I was called in to attend an interview that had knocked at my door in 2012, around the same time. The lady director was delighted when I remembered her name, even after 2 years.
It was just a few days since I had joined one of Bangalore’s oldest and well-known Communication & Behavioral Skills and Language Training Institutes. I was the only Senior Trainer at the institute; however, I started indulging in the centre management activities and tasks, as my boss wanted me to handle the centre independently, in the next 3 months’ time.
I used to conduct the training programs for the senior corporate executives of different nationalities, software and civil engineers, central bank employees, finance professionals, college students and job seekers. Each training program earned me positive feedback that made me put in my best, further on.
On that fateful day, I was introduced to a trainee for the One on One coaching program. He was a bespectacled, 6’2″, well-built 20-year-old young man, who had been failed by 5 other trainers. I acquainted myself with his background and for the next two days, was lost for words.
On the very second day, I had made up my mind to have a talk with my boss. Training this young man was not in might, after all; however, on the 3rd day as he entered the classroom, something miraculous happened. The young man had already started responding to my training, seriously.
Well, he is an autistic boy, who behaved like a 3-year-old kid, despite being 20. He is the youngest grandson of one of our Ex PMs. And both his parents are doctors. Mother is not practicing, though.
A few of his typical behaviors were to make faces, pick nose intermittently, lick his nose, blink his eyes constantly, would never sit still, would dress up shabbily and at times would wear the same outfit for 3 to 4 days. Listening was not in his list of doable! He would feel a great pride in addressing our 22-year-old office boy as an uncle, with all his boyish charm that defied his well-built physique.
Unlike the others, he failed to understand the topics that were considered bad or were social taboos etc. The negatives attracted him more! If given a chance he would chit chat non-stop with other corporate trainees or the college students at the institute. Speaking on the same topic, non-stop, each day was his favorite activity. He would show his grave discontentment in his typical ways, when asked not to. So, handling him was not an easy task.
That night as I offered my bedtime prayers, I made up my mind to get off this training program ASAP. To my wonderment, I visualized a very bright light with my closed eyes. When I did open my eyes, I was left with a deep revelation and at that very moment, I had made up my mind to help this kid. I thanked the Universe for having chosen me for this complex task. I knew, I was the chosen medium and definitely had it in me to bring about the requisite positive changes in the life of this kid, failed by many, in the past.
Interestingly, the 3rd day onwards, we became the best of buddies. He was my “SON” and I was his Ma’am. I designed the course for him and the next 4 months gave me the best learning of my life.
To witness him grow from a 3-year-old kid to celebrating his 21st birthday, acknowledging himself as a grown-up boy, surpassed all the joys that I had ever felt so far. I felt blessed to the core to see him happy and joyous, when appreciated by all.
This boy, who had his unconventional set of intelligence, ensured that he would keep up his conduct at its best for he wished to make me feel proud of him and was aware that the magic wand was in his own hands. He would rejoice to watch the recording of his own presentations and improved with each passing day. His intelligence is something, I am still amazed about!!
The day he did not attend the class for any reason, I would miss him and his antics. As soon as he came back, he would narrate his lengthy stories from the trip, exaggerating to the maximum and had many of his imagery friends involved. In his self-made stories that I was supposed to consider as real, he would often catch the goons, or bang his car on to big Indian Army vehicles on the national highways etc. And in the end, he would very diplomatically say, “Ma’am, I missed you!!”
During the course of his training program his past coach, who was a pastor visited and thanked me for the progress this child had shown. His caretaker would often sit through the classes and be astonished at how my trainee’s behavior improved for the better. Although, tying the shoelace or buttoning up his shirt sleeves were still a challenge for him, nevertheless he started dressing up smartly.
In the 3rd month, his doctors flew down from Delhi, joined in by their team in Bangalore, along with his parents. They questioned my way of training, to understand how I did it all, in the absence of any special certification. In fact, they challenged me for having undertaken this training. I knew, I had the Universe as my guide.
The Universe had had its own grand plans in making me step on to teaching at the tender age of 16. Eventually, post my graduation in Bio Science, I did land up with a job in teaching at a senior secondary school, even though the plans were to pursue medicine or become a university professor in Genetics. Starting with the senior secondary students, later having taught the innocent minds of UKG students at an Army School, life had definitely come a full circle for me.
When I look back now, I realize that all I had given to the boy was the attention and respect, which he deserved, the appreciation and a pat on his back for each and every improvement of his and most importantly, plenty of affection and motherly love.
And today, when I am into learning & development, building the adult positive minds with an Internationally Accredited Certification in Behavioral Skills Training to back me up, I thank the Universe for having sent this bright boy to me. He certified me in the skills that no institute or training firm would ever have, conferred upon me!!
To me he remains the best example of how “Nothing is Impossible”, “How to overcome fears of all kinds”, “Stepping out of one’s shell or comfort zone”, “Seeing life from others’ perspective”, “Respecting others’ point of view” and many more!!
I was his trainer for sure; however, the child has left me far more enriched and a far better human being.
My dear trainee, you gave me the final insight into “Building the Positive Minds”.
You are that one trainee, who gave me a new perspective on life. God bless you S.G!!
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Priya Gajamer
Founder & L&D Principal Consultant, CorpMantra Academy
An artistically inclined, health enthusiast, holding a degree in BioScience, with 20+ years of work experience, spanning across industries. An IAF Certified Corporate Trainer in Soft Skills, and a Strategy Consultant for Global IT Services, she also dons the hat of an ardent blogger for Health & Wellness, IT & Retail, and is a Social Change Activist.